Give and Take

I recently watched the movie Lone Survivor. I also watched The Wolf of Wall Street. These are two very different movies. But they both got me thinking. And my brain on wheels made a connection.

Lone Survivor, if you have not seen or heard of it, is based on a nonfiction book of the same name, written by Marcus Luttrell and Patrick Robinson. It tells the story of a Navy Seal mission in Afghanistan gone wrong. I don’t want to give away the movie in case you intend to watch it. What the movie made me think was how some people give without question. In this case, some people gave their lives in the service of their country and their military brothers.

Now, The Wolf of Wall Street is the complete opposite. This movie is based on the memoir of Jordan Belfort, a former stockbroker convicted of fraud. Although the movie was funny and entertaining, it completely disgusted me. It showcased humans at their worst, absolutely selfish and corrupted. And it made me think of how some people take without question.

I have told you before that I think humans are self centered and self serving by nature. We want what we want and we’ll do what it takes to get it. We seek to fill our needs and desires.  Watching the Wolf, like watching and reading the news, reminded me of this. It reminded me that humans can be, and often are, disgusting, greedy, inconsiderate pigs. Yes, I know that sounds awful, but we are awful sometimes.

Of course, our selfishness doesn’t just manifest itself in big ways. It is on display every time we disregard the feelings of others. Just think about the people in your own lives, the people around you. Think about your own behavior. When you cut someone off in traffic. When you talk on your phone while in the checkout line. When you don’t show your appreciation for someone’s efforts. When you belittle or insult. When you lie. When you demand others to do or give you what you want. When you just expect people to help you when you need it, but then don’t return the favor. When you blame others for your problems. When your conversations revolve around your own troubles and you never ask the other person how they are doing. When you take others for granted. I don’t mean you, as in you individually or specifically. I mean you and me, all of us humans. We all are guilty and we all know people who are guilty.

Blah, blah, blah. I've said all this before and you are probably sick of me ragging on the human race. So, let’s move on, shall we.

These two movies provided a study in contrast for me. I asked myself, “If we are all selfish by nature, what accounts for people who are willing to sacrifice their lives for others?”  And though it is easy to cite examples of human wickedness, there are also stories of great humanity. The true story behind Lone Survivor is such an example. Not only did members of the military give without question, but an Afghan villager helped save the life of an American soldier despite the danger involved.

I recently read about a young boy who died after going back into a burning house to help save a family member.

Last year, Typhoon Haiyan devastated the Philippines. So many organizations gave money to aid those affected. And individuals from different countries and different backgrounds traveled there on their own dime to help in any way they could. People who won't be recognized in the news.

A story came out of the Olympics regarding an opposing coach who ran out to aid an Alpine skier who broke his ski. The coach put on a replacement ski and the competitor was at least able to finish the race. The coach had nothing to gain by helping the skier. 

What about people like Mother Teresa? Martin Luther King, Jr? Mohandas Gandhi? Nelson Mandela? Malala Yousafzai?

These are just notable examples. But again, think about those around you. Maybe they haven’t risked their lives or donated large sums of money. Maybe they gave their time and energy. They didn't have to, but they did. Maybe they offered an ear to listen and shoulder to cry on when you were feeling down. Maybe they bought or made you a gift they obviously put some thought into. Maybe they fed you or gave you a ride or lent you money. Maybe they have infinite patience and put up with all your faults without pointing them out. Maybe they are always helping or giving to others. I know people like that.

So, after considering all this, I had to question my belief that we are all bad, selfish creatures by nature. Is it possible that we are actually inherently good? I used to believe that we were, back when life hadn't chipped away at the idealist in me. But maybe I've always held on to that, somewhere deep down inside.

But if we are all inherently good, what happens to lead us astray? Conversely, if we are all inherently bad, what accounts for the stories of heroism and sacrifice? Is it what we are taught? Is it experience? Does life push us in one direction or the other? Or is it society? Is it all dependent on chemicals or processes in our brains?

I wish that I had a brain for science and could understand human behavior. But then again, maybe it’s not all scientific. Science, after all, can’t always predict human behavior. There’s something else, something more. I don’t know the answers to these questions. I don’t know if we are good or bad by nature. But I would like to think that whatever the answer is, we are all capable of doing good, even great things. I would like to believe there is a hero, or even a saint, in all of us.

What do you think?