I know I just recently hit you with a controversial subject
and maybe you would like me to write about something funny. I apologize, but
again I find myself focusing on something that may cause some discomfort.
I just finished the book The
Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd. It touched on quite a few emotional
themes, some of which touched me. While I would love to write about them all,
there is one in particular that really had me thinking. And that is racism.
The events of the book take place in the American South in
1964, the same year the Civil Rights Act was passed. The main character, Lily
Owens, is a teenage white girl whose mother died when Lily was very young.
Neglected by her abusive father, Lily is loved and cared for by Rosaleen, a black
woman who acts as a surrogate mother to her. Rosaleen has a run in with some of
the town’s most racist men and is arrested. Angry with her father and fearing
for Rosaleen’s safety, Lily decides they both need to leave town. Her destination is Tiburon, SC, the city
printed on the back of an image of Mary as a black woman Lily found among a few
of her mother’s belongings.
Lily and Rosaleen make their way to the home of August,
June, and May Boatwright. These three black women are beekeepers whose honey
containers are labeled with the image of Mary as a black woman. The sisters
take in Lily and Rosaleen, not only giving them a place to live, but a place to
learn, to thrive, and to call home, both literally and figuratively.
Throughout the book, Lily comes across very racist people
who disapprove of her staying with the Boatwright family. But she is happy
there. There she experiences the love and nurturing she has been missing for
too long. And she can’t understand why she should leave. Like Lily, I sometimes
wonder if “life would be better if God had deleted skin pigmentation.”
Though I am not black, I am Hispanic, and I have experienced
racism. It hurts. And in those moments, I wondered how people could be so
cruel…and so damn ignorant. I wonder how it is that we haven’t gotten to the
point where all are judged by the content of their character and not by the
color of their skin. Because in the end, there are good and bad people of all
colors.
Why? Why do people focus on skin color? For that matter, why
do people focus on any physical attributes? Why do people focus on creed,
culture, religion, gender, sexual preference? How can you rightfully say that
you know someone based on any of those things? How can you rightfully say they
are good or bad based on any of those things? You really can’t, can you?
But, I know that this issue, like most, is not black and
white. Racism is a complicated issue.
It is a learned thing, true. Some pass on their ideas to
their children. And they, in turn, pass them to their children. In this way,
that ignorance, that hatred, continues to burn, despite the advances we make as
a society.
But where does it come from? How does it all begin? We aren't just born with racist genes are we?
Well, what if we are born with something that causes us to
judge others we see as different? When you think about it, we are all prejudice
to some degree. Prejudice simply means “prejudgment.” And don’t we all
prejudge in some fashion? Even Lily had her moments. She questioned Rosaleen’s
intelligence. She was indignant about June’s initial treatment of her because
she was white. Like her, we all have our moments. Perhaps we don’t always say
it aloud. Perhaps we don’t even admit it to ourselves. But don’t we all think
certain thoughts about people we see or hear about that we don’t really know? Really
think about it. Maybe it’s the girl wearing the short skirt or the guy wearing
baggy jeans. Maybe it’s the person with the tattoos and piercings or the person
wearing glasses and a suit. Maybe it’s someone who looks foreign. And that can
differ depending on what country you think they are from. Maybe it’s someone
who works at a fast food restaurant or someone who works for a law firm. I
could go on and on. Point is, we may all find judgmental thoughts creeping into
our heads, and we may not even realize it at the time. We might even treat these
people differently without knowing it. Why?
I think that again, we are not completely evolved. We still
have basic, animal tendencies. And like animals, our ancestors made “prejudgments”
about other creatures. For our ancestors, the ability to survive often depended
on our ability to discern whether or not something or someone was our enemy.
Think about how some animals react to our presence. They
freeze or run or hide or attack. Because they don’t know if we are going to pet
them or eat them. And that is how they react to other creatures as well. As far
as they know, creatures other than their own are dangerous. So maybe, we still
have that tendency. Maybe that not yet evolved part of us sees those that are different
as a danger to our own.
But why can’t we move past that? Why don’t we evolve to a
higher state of being which allows us to see beyond and within?
There is no doubt that there are just evil, bad people in
the world with black hearts full of hate. There are people who have been taught
to hate. There are people who have experienced trauma that affected their
ability to love and accept. Until we evolve completely, there will always be
people of this nature. But what about the rest of us? Can’t we get past it?
I like to think that we are on the right path. I myself
married a man of German, Irish, and Italian descent. Our son is quite a mix.
And as I look around me, I see a lot of mixes. And that makes me proud. It wasn’t
that long ago after all, that people of different races weren’t allowed to
marry or were disowned it they did. But still, I mention race. Is it necessary?
And we recently saw the passing of a landmark gay rights act
that recognizes marriage between people of the same sex. It makes me so happy.
Yet, there are people still fighting it, still spewing hate.
And religion. How many wars are being fought, how many lives
are taken in the name of religion? Why? When so many religions leaders, past
and present, have preached the power of love and good deeds? When religions
speak to spiritual enlightenment?
Why? Why? Why?
I know I can keep asking and contemplating, but answers won’t
come easily or quickly. This is just a lowly blog and I am neither scientist
nor psychologist. I am just a curious, questioning reader and writer.
Please read this book. And please look in the mirror and ask
yourself if your mind is as free as it should be. Can you look past color, past gender, past religion? Can you look beyond, within, and see to the human heart and soul?
I hope that one day we all can.
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